Well.. I kept it to myself all day today.. But I would be lieing if I said it wasn't on my mind. Ten years ago today, my first wife Allison and I divorced. I truly thought that I would be with her forever. I loved her completely and in some ways still do today. After the divorce it felt like the one person closest to me had died. She was there everyday all of the time and then just like that, gone from my life forever.
I was once asked by a close friend, "What if the one that got away came back"... And for me, it is a mangled thought. In my head it is as if she died and there is no chance of that.. But away from the awkward functioning of my inner emotions and brain that have that set in my mind, I would love to sit down to talk to her.. Just to learn about where her life went onto when it ended for us. I would love to see and know that she is happy in her present life and that our end led to bigger and better things for her.
Beyond that, would I want her back? As much as I do still love her to this day, the answer is a very simply no. When she decided to leave it was for a reason. At the time I felt the reason was for herself, but looking at the last decade I can see where she thought it was probably better for us both, and I thank her.
If she had not left me, I wouldn't now have my two beautiful daughters... I wouldn't have made many decisions as I have to lead me to things I am proud and thankful for today. I wouldn't be involved in entertainment, I wouldn't have met many of the people I know today and I would not have experienced the many situations good and bad that make me who I am today.
So in remembrance of my first wife Allison.. Allison, I love you greatly and will always be appreciative for the time we had together, the memories we share in our absence and mostly for being strong enough to leave and allow us both to have the lives that we do today. I know that I wasn't the best person in the world and I apologize for my flaws. I'm very happy with who I am today and I credit you for contributing to my personal character. I have heard that you remarried and have children of your own and I am so very proud for you. I wish you a lifetime of happiness and appreciate you giving me the opportunity to see out the same.
Much Love,
Willy
